Yet again

I realize life is quite unpredictable, no matter how much I want to predict the future. The transition from college to the so-called real world turned out to be harder than I thought it would be, but after the initial adjustment at my new job and 4 months of studying for yet another standardized exam, I finally have time to pick up on reading.

I have a bunch of books downloaded on my Nook, but for now I am reading Anna Karenina and Jane Eyre. I have been dreaming of reading both books for quite some time, so I finally started them. I am also reading "Buddha's Brain." I have read just a few chapters, so I will write more about the book once I finish it.

In the meantime, I have started looking at various graduate programs and books on different career paths in Psychology. Despite some ups and downs, I try to keep an open mind and pick the option that would allow me to do what my heart wants to do.

Updates to follow...

Half the Sky

"Half the Sky" by Nicholas D. Kristof and Sheryl WuDunn is an incredibly inspiring and, at the same time, a heartbreaking book.

They tell the stories of girls/women who have survived war, rape, fistulas, hunger, genital cutting, etc. These are stories that would make you shutter, cry, and sit in disbelief, but they will also make you belief (if you don't yet) that everyone can make a difference in this world. These are stories of women who have been through hell, but who found enough inner strength to build schools, hospitals and run businesses.

Kristof and WuDunn stress that what undeveloped countries need to do is educate girls/women. Yes, they need a lot of financial support, but just money won't change anything.

This is one of those books that I can't recommend enough. Also at the end of the book the authors offer suggestions on how you can get involved and make a difference in someone's life.

Looking past limits

An inspirational talk by Caroline Casey.

Her message: "Be you. Truly believe in yourself and you can make a difference."

One day's wages

Wondering how to make a difference? Here is one project you can get involved with: http://www.onedayswages.org/

Community service

How do you contribute to your community? Do you donate some of your time or money to a cause? Why do you do it?

I had never done community service until I came to the US. Why? First, I was too caught up in school and responsibilities at home. But second, and most important, I hadn't seen many people volunteering their time or I hadn't met someone to tell me it would be good to get involved in a project and invest some of my time to the community. Yes, that is not the greatest excuse, but sometimes, we need positive role models to teach us things we never knew or thought about. And even while in my country, I met one such role model. She taught me that money do not matter as long as you do something you love. She taught me to think not only about myself, but for others and whenever possible, to help others.

Community service plays a huge role in the US, but not in my country. Could this change? And how? What if we teach children that, for example, by sparing an hour of their week, they can make a difference in someone's life? If you have ever done anything like that, you know that the biggest reward is to know you have extended a hand to someone who needed it and have made their day a little better. After all, if you are in a tough situation, wouldn't you appreciate someone assisting you in your difficulty?
 
My friend and I have been talking about things like that for the last couple of days. Of course, many people are skeptical that one or two people can change a whole nation, but what if we can? What if we start in a small town and become role models for others?


The best part is that most of the time you can make a difference without donating any money. It's all about your time and your passion to spend time with other people and help with simple things such as painting a room or starting a garden or reading stories to children.

A Child Called "It"

"A Child Called 'it'" is the heartbreaking and inspiring story of Dave Pelzer - a survivor of severe child abuse. Dave grew up in a middle class family in the 1960s. However, his family quickly changed from normal to abnormal when Dave was 4-5 years old. His mother started punishing him for the smallest things by putting him in the corner, but things quickly escalated. She was also drinking more and more, and spent most of the day laying on the couch, depressed. Dave became "the boy" and "it." He was starved for days, beaten on a regular basis, stabbed, burned, and fed with Clorox, to name just a few. He slept on a cot in the garage and was banned from the table and from any communication with his father and brothers. In 1973, when Dave was 5th grade, the school nurse and his teachers finally realized how bad the situation was and called the police. Dave never saw his mother after that day.

The book is hard to read because I kept asking myself on one side, how could someone do such things to her own child, and on the other side, why everyone kept closing their eyes even though Dave was extremely thin and covered in bruises all the time.

There is a part of the epilogue which really touched my heart, so I would like to share it here:
"I'm so blessed. The challenges of my past have made me immensely strong inside. I adapted quickly, learning how to survive from a bad situation. I learned the secret of internal motivation. My experience gave me a different outlook on life, that others may never know. I have a vast appreciation for things that others may take for granted" (p. 157).

Dave tells his story in a trilogy: this is the first book covering the events in Dave's life between the ages of 4 and 12. The next book, "The Lost Boy" presents his life from ages 12 to 18, and the third book, "A Man Called Dave" tells Dave's story as a young man. I hope to read the next two books soon.

At the end of the book, there are some suggestions to other books about child abuse for those who are interested in the topic. These include "Stolen Innocence" by Erin Merryn, "Ultimate Judgement" by Meg Clairmonte and Aurora Mackey, and "Fat, Stupid, Ugly: One Woman's Courage to Survive" by Debrah Constance.

A nice walk

Sometimes all it takes for a peaceful mind is a nice long walk in the sun. Here are a few shots of a 2 hour walk on a sunny day during Spring break.

An Unquiet Mind

"An unquiet mind" by Kay Jamison is a wonderfully written, very emotional memoir. Dr. Jamison received her Ph.D. from UCLA and joined the faculty in 1974, right before experiencing her first full blown manic episode. She has manic-depressive illness (now called bipolar disorder), but successfully teaches, supervises interns, and treats patients. She has been through many hypomanic and several manic episodes and suicide depressions before she started taking lithium more consistently. Lithium is the only drug that has been proven effective for bipolar disorder, but the biggest problem among patients is compliance because once they feel better they stop taking it and the mania returns. And as with all drugs, lithium could have severe side effects. Also, as Jamison points out, many people miss some of the things they can do when in a manic state and some of the strong feelings they experience.

I have seen an interview with Dr. Jamison about a year ago and I am glad I was able to finally read her book. It is fascinating how she managed to be both a doctor and a patient at the same time.